A New Year’s Re-Resolution: Raising Children of Character
by Russell T. Williams
The hourglass ticks to completion on 2008 as we welcome a new year of opportunity for raising kids of character. There is no greater challenge for today’s parents to keep an ever-renewing focus on this societal responsibility.
One of America’s finest thinkers on character education, Dr. Kevin Ryan, Ph.D, founder and director emeritus of Boston University' s Center for the Advancement of Ethics and Character (CAEC), co-authored an important book called, Character In Schools.
In his book, as well as in an essay that appeared in a CAEC quarterly journal, he writes, "It is one of those essential facts of life that raising good children…children of character…demands time and attention." These ten tips, says Ryan, will help focus your character training to build up kids of character.
1. Put parenting first. Make developing your child's character a parenting priority.
2. Review how you spend the hours and days of your week. Plan how you can weave you children into your social life and knit yourself into their lives.
3. Be a good example. This is probably your most important job.
4. Develop an ear and an eye for what your children are absorbing. As parents we must control the flow of ideas and images that are influencing our children.
5. Use the language of character. Use the clear, sharp language of right and wrong.
6. Punish with a loving heart. Children must understand that punishment is a source of parental love.
7. Learn to listen to your children. Take them seriously and set aside time to listen.
8. Get deeply involved in your child's school life. Helping our children become good students is another name for helping them to acquire strong character.
9. Make a big deal out of the family meal. Family mealtime should communicate and sustain the ideals that children will draw on throughout their lives.
10. Do not reduce character education to words alone. We gain virtue through practice. The bottom line in character development is behavior.
Ryan concludes by stating, "For most of us, the greatest opportunity we personally have to deepen our own character is through the daily blood, sweat and tears of struggling to be good parents."
